13 Weeks

Today I am 13 weeks and the baby is about three inches long.  The milestone today is ... fingerprints!  It is really amazing to think that the baby probably only weighs about an ounce but already has his or her unique fingerprints.


Speaking of other teeny-tiny things, if the baby is a girl (which OBVIOUSLY she is!), she already has over 2 million eggs in her ovaries!


Next week marks the beginning of the second trimester, which according to the books, is a time of "relative comfort for most pregnant women."  While I have been feeling better overall, I am still having some bad days, so I hope to enjoy some of that relative comfort soon!


I went to the mom 2 mom sale with my friend Loe'l this morning, but I didn't find anything.  They didn't have any big items besides a highchair that another woman swooped on moments before I could, and the rest was basically clothes, which does NOT help me because I don't know the sex of the baby.  So I will definitely go to the next one to look again, but I think they might be better after the baby comes if they are mostly clothes again.  At least I got to scope things out and see what to expect in the future!

Music!

We decided to play the baby his/her first music tonight.  Jeremy was playing records on the turntable, and then he finally believed me that the baby wouldn't be able to hear it ... the womb just doesn't work that way.  So, he got his old CD player and we hooked the baby up.

Yes, I realize I look huge in this picture, but I want to remember this moment!

Any guesses as to what we played baby Dimick?

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

The Beatles, of course!! "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" is playing as I type!

12 Weeks

Twelve weeks already.  I would love to report that I am feeling better, but now it's more like intermittent horribleness.  One day I will be feeling awesome (and then I stupidly say something like, "Jeremy!  I think I am turning a corner here!") and then the next day I will be back on the couch unable to lift my head.  But at least I am having some good days!


On Thursday I was actually thinking about posting about how much better things were getting, but I decided to wait for Friday.  Friday morning I was feeling fantastic.  I had a morning meeting at work (still feeling fantastic) and then I was driving home and ... BAM.  I threw up in a Tim Horton's bag while driving on the expressway.  It was so freaky and came out of nowhere!  Most of what I have been dealing with is just that overwhelming nausea feeling, and I wasn't even feeling nauseated when this happened!  I called Jeremy panicked and crying (which turns out, didn't help), and then got home and took a 3-hour nap.  What a weird day!


Anyway, two more weeks and the first trimester will be a distant memory!  This week the baby is the size of a lime ...

... and I am apparently already the size of a house! :)


But amazing things are happening this week.  The baby is developing REFLEXES!  Reflexes!!  I told Jeremy (through sobs, of course) and he was just as shocked as I was that the baby is opening and closing its little fingers, curling its toes, and making SUCKING MOVEMENTS!  It is just too amazing.


Nerve cells are forming rapidly now, and synapses in the brain are forming furiously.  The face also looks more human now.


The baby probably looks something like this today:

Except, let's be honest -- my baby probably already has a MUCH bigger butt than normal babies at this point! :)


The next doctor's appointment is this Thursday, and Jeremy will get to go with me to hear the heart beat!!  I am so excited!  Maybe they will also tell me it is twins, and that is why I am already as big as a moose!

11 Weeks

The first trimester is drawing to a close, and I am getting EXCITED!  People keep promising I will feel better soon, and I am sure in the mood for that!

Today the baby is about two inches long, and he or she is kicking, moving, twirling and spinning in there!


There are hair follicles developing on his/her head, some of his/her bones are beginning to harden, and the beds of the fingernails and toenails are also forming for nails that will begin growing soon.


Testes are forming if it is a boy, and the ovaries are forming if it is a girl.


And, finally, even though I can't feel it, the baby might be hiccuping a lot these days because the diaphragm is developing.

Materinty Clothes and Shopping and Crying, Oh My!!

I wore MATERNITY CLOTHES today!!  In honor of such a momentous occasion, I took a picture, and I even took ... a BELLY SHOT!

You may have noticed a lack of belly pictures, and to be honest, I have been embarrassed to take any.  I started showing very early, and after hearing about a thousand mothers tell me I probably won't show until the 4th or 5th month, I was feeling fat.  I was sure that I was just gaining pudge, and I didn't want to go showing that off to the Internet.


Well, guess, what?  I have lost SEVENTEEN pounds since getting pregnant, and I still gained THIS bump ...

I am assuming it is baby-related and not fat-related.  I also read that if your abs were not in such great shape when you get pregnant you are likely to show earlier because there is not much resistance.  I'll be honest.  My abs were NOT in tip-top shape when I got pregnant, so I think it just popped right out.


So, NO MORE SHAME!  I have a bump and it is not fat!!  I'll just tell strangers that I am like 5 months along when they ask! ;)


In addition to all this excitement, Jeremy and my mom when to Babies 'R Us today ... and I got so overwhelmed that I cried.  Kind of a lot.


The crib I thought I liked was WRONG WRONG WRONG in real life, and they didn't have the swing or bouncy seat I wanted to check out.  I was also very underwhelmed by the car seat stroller combos.  The seat does NOT seem secure in that stroller.  What if we move to San Francisco and have to go downhill all the time and the seat pops out??


Anyway, it was all just too much.  Like the first time I went shopping for my wedding dress and the consultant wasn't bringing me the dresses I asked for and I felt like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man and left crying.  The moral of the story is that I went back a few weeks later and the second dress I tried on was the one and I bought it and took it home with me and looked at it lovingly every day for 10 months until the wedding.  So, the next baby shopping trip will probably be amazing.  Right?

10 Weeks

The baby is 10 WEEKS today!!

The baby is about an inch and a half long today -- a half inch longer than last week -- and about the size of a prune.  Even though the baby is only the size of a prune, his/her elbows are working!  Bones and cartilage are also forming, and the little teeth buds are appearing under the gums.

The baby has completed the most crucial part of his or her development, and now begins the time of rapid growth and development of the tissues and organs.

And I feel like a failure -- I totally missed the transition from embryo to fetus!!  I was SO sure it was at 10 weeks when the graduation takes place, but it turns out it was NINE weeks!  Jeremy even said "Happy Fetus Day!" to me when I woke up, and then after reading up to write this post, I had to admit I was wrong.  

9 Weeks

Nine weeks snuck up on us with the due date change, but it is certainly welcome!


This week, the baby is about an inch long and the size of a grape.  

The baby is also starting to look more "human."  The tail should be gone by now (!), and his or her little heart will finish dividing into four chamber and developing valves, at the same time his or her little teeth are developing.  

The external sex organs are in place and all figured out, although we wouldn't be able to see them for a few more weeks ... IF we decide to learn the sex of the baby before the birth (BIG DEBATE IN THE DIMICK HOUSE!!!!)

Now that the baby's basic physiology is in place, he or she is poised for rapid weight gain!  We can't wait!!

What a Difference 45 Minutes Makes!

After I finished complaining writing my last post, I called my gal pal, Jenn, who also works at Baker College and just had a lovely baby herself.  I asked her if it was normal to not have an ultrasound until 20 weeks, and she calmed my nerves.  But she ALSO gave me the contact information for the Director of the Diagnostic Medical Sonography program at Baker.  


I sent her an e-mail saying I would love to be a patient for her students if she needed me, and ... she called me 15 minutes later!!  AND she asked if I could come in THIS COMING MONDAY FOR AN ULTRASOUND!!!!!!!!!


She said they usually don't like to do ultrasounds on women who have not had one done by their primary doctor, but as long as I realized the position they would be in if they saw something and needed to recommend I see my doctor immediately, then I could come in.  Of course, I said HECK YES, and if she DID see something, it would not have been found this early if not for her anyway, so I would be very grateful.  


I just could not be more excited!  And she will send me home with PICTURES, so next week I will have some fun stuff to post! :)

First Offical Doctor's Appointment

Yesterday I saw the midwife at Meridan's Women's Health and had the big, long informational visit.  She didn't seem scared about my family history, so that's good.  Apparently they are more concerned with a family history of Down's Syndrome, immunodeficiency diseases, and birth defects than they are with large amount of cancer in my family. They also did not chastise me for being an "obese mother," which I was freaking out about, so all in all it was pretty good.


During the exam, she said everything looks great and I am actually closer to nine weeks than eight, like I originally thought.  She also gave me a new due date of August 28th instead of September 5th.


It's really weird though, because I am feeling really down in the dumps today.  I had really thought they would do SOMETHING to be sure my baby was in there growing ... I knew I might not be able to hear a heartbeat yet, but practically every mother I have talked to in the past few weeks has said they got an early ultrasound.  So why didn't I?  


They also said I won't be getting my first ultrasound until 19-20 weeks!! That seems late to me.  And, of course, when I made my next appointment for the middle of February, I didn't have the presence of mind to ask if they will be looking for a heartbeat that day.  And now I am afraid to call and ask.  But I would really like to know, because if they ARE, Jeremy wants to be there, and it would have to be moved to a Friday.  And if they AREN'T, then I need to find a way to explain that I NEED that to happen.


Yes, I know the solution to this is all very simple:  CALL THE PLACE. But, if you know me well, you know my struggles with anxiety and panic (which I really don't have the time, energy, or space to explain here), and you know that a simple phone call like that can reduce me to tears.  Believe me.  I have been hung up on a lot.  Years ago, I couldn't even order a pizza.  Thankfully, I can do so now.  Otherwise, I might have wasted away to nothing by now! :)


Anyway, I am feeling sad and like it still isn't real, but I do love the midwife I met with yesterday.  When I told her about the nausea, she gave me a prescription (love her!), but she also said, "Oh, honey, I know right now you are thinking 'I did NOT sign up for this!' but soon you will be loving this pregnancy!"  


When she asked me if I had any travel plans for the rest of the pregnancy, I told her about my dad's big banquet in Detroit at the end of August that is bigger than his wedding, my wedding, and the birth of Jesus combined and he needed me there, she said, "Well, stop by the day of the banquet, and we'll give you your file.  They have lovely hospitals in Detroit."  So I bet my dad will be happy to hear that. :)


My mom said I need to write more about how I'm happy to be pregnant. Let me direct you here and here.  Yes, I am ECSTATIC to be having a child.  But, unfortunately, right now I am not too excited with my personal pregnancy.  But that doesn't mean I am not still grateful and excited, and I have high hopes that I will be happy soon.  So, here's to hoping!!

Food Woes

I have been struggling more and more with food lately.  Yesterday, the only thing I could stomach was ... french fries.  

Yes, greasy, terrible, lacking in nutritional content french fries. However, they totally saved the day. I was having a B-A-D day yesterday.  I felt all sick and die-y, and it all came to a head when I was driving downtown to meet Jeremy for his lunch break, and I nearly got into a car accident ... on purpose.  A man ignored a yield sign and tried to pull out in front of me at the last second in a rotary, and I seriously considered jerking the wheel and teaching him a lesson ... road rage style.  Apparently the look on my face was enough, because he whipped it into reverse SO FAST.


I got to the restaurant before Jeremy and Loel, and the waitress actually asked if I was okay.  I guess I looked that green.  So I ate an entire basket of fries before they even showed up, and I felt GREAT for the rest of the day.


Anyway, I woke up today feeling really terrible, and couldn't think of anything to eat.  So I drank a few ounces of a protein drink and headed to Meijer.  DEAR GOD.  I almost sat down in the middle of the aisle at one point and gave up.  I considered calling Jeremy at work to come get me.  I cried twice.  Once because I went to buy ingredients for a lovely soup I was going to make my friend Heather today, and when I saw one of the ingredients, which is also one of my favorite foods, I had to run away so I wouldn't ruin ANOTHER purse by puking in it.  The other time because I saw a bib in the baby aisle that said "I may be small, but I'm the boss."  I actually sobbed at that point.


After TWO HOURS at the store and only getting four little bags of food, I got home and made myself a snack I was really hoping would make me less of a basket-case.


Take a look at this:

I feel like I am in a commercial.  And it was DELICIOUS.  And now I feel stellar.  


I was shocked, because the baby has refused every other type of cracker, but for some reason Toasteds are okay.  Hmmm.  


I really hope this continues to be a good snack and I can pack it for work this week, because I have SO few foods I can eat right now.

7 Weeks ...

... supposedly.  I just confirmed with my doctor/midwife's office that if I want an early ultrasound to determine my actual due date, it will not be for another two weeks.  Splendid.  So, until then, I am still using my best guesstimate, and therefore, I am probably seven weeks today. Yay!


I have been waiting for this particular early milestone ever since I first cracked open What to Expect When You're Expecting ... the baby is now TEN THOUSAND TIMES bigger than it was a month ago!!  That boggles my mind!


Even though he/she is growing exponentially, it is probably still only a quarter of an inch long and the size of a blueberry. 


The biggest fetal growth this week will be the head -- the brain cells are being generated at ONE HUNDRED cells a minute.  


And, good news -- the tail has almost entirely disappeared (hopefully)!

The arm and leg buds are growing longer and stronger and are now dividing into hand, arm, and shoulder segments and leg, knee, and foot segments.

This is crazy -- the baby has now gone through THREE sets of kidneys!  The ones in place now are the ones he/she will have permanently, and will being fulfilling their waste management duties next week.

The baby now has partial eyelids covering eyes that already have some color!

He/she also has an appendix and a pancreas already!

I'm sorry I keep ending every sentence with an exclamation mark!  I just can't stop!  

Anyway, that's week seven for the baby.  Week seven has started out relatively okay for me.  I read that 75% of women deal with this "all-the-livelong-day" sickness, and of them, half will feel better by 14 weeks, and MOST of the rest will feel better a few weeks after that.  So ... the odds are on my side!  I'm not okay, but I'm also not in the fetal position, so I've got that going for me.

Something else I had never read before -- I currently have 10% more blood than I did before pregnancy, and by the time the baby is full term I will have 45% more blood!  Crazy.

Well, that's about all.  I can't wait to get into the second trimester and start seeing and feeling more exciting changes (that don't involve nausea and huge, painful boobs!).

Call Morgan Spurlock, Because I Think This McDonald's Relationship Might Be Official

I went back to work today ... let me just sum it up by saying it is TRULY embarrassing to have a hard time teaching a college class because standing up and speaking is enough to exhaust you and make your voice all wavery.  A few times I pretended that I was searching for a word so I could take a few deep breaths.  So now my students think I am so out of shape I get winded from standing AND I am inarticulate.  Maybe not the greatest strategy, but it was the best I could come up with at the time.


I also learned that the only reasons I was not experiencing certain pregnancy symptoms that people asked about was because I was living on the couch and the nausea was so overwhelming I could not feel anything else.  Well, standing up straight for 10 minutes in fancy shoes was enough for me to develop such an ache in my lower back I had the urge to grab at it like you can only get away with when you look nine months pregnant.  Yikes.


I have to say, though, I think the only reason I didn't end up on the floor in the fetal position, rocked by nausea is because I stopped for an Egg McMuffin again.  The only other day I remember not feeling like dying was the first day I stopped for an Egg McMuffin breakfast, so I have a sneaking suspicion that it might be the key to my success.  I guess it could be worse.


I also stopped at Taco Bell on the way home and got a Strawberry Fruitista Freeze, and OHMYGOD, I loved those things before, but NOW?  I want need a million a day.  Thankfully, I had found a recipe an hour before that for a strawberry-lime freeze, and Jeremy said he would make me one tonight.  Yumlicious.


There was one highly odd and scary moment today: I sneezed, and there was such a deep, stabbing pain across my abdomen that I gasped and nearly swerved off the road.  I have never felt anything like that before, and I am hoping there is someone out there who can explain it and ease my worries.  So, get on it! 

Meh ...

There has not been to much to report around here, except for the fact that I have been experiencing some serious ups and downs.


One minute I am feeling awesome and the next minute I have crumbled to the couch, my whole body overcome with ... horribleness.  I think the good moments are actually making things worse, because I get all excited and do exhausting things and forget to eat a nibble every hour, and then I plummet to the bottom of my "feeling like dying" meter.


My cravings lately have consisted of kalamata olives, Claussen pickles, and melted American cheese (on ANYTHING, but I can mostly only eat it on while grain bagels).


I am also VERY anxious to get to the doctor.  I need some proof and some questions answered.  I have been having some very slight cramping on and off, and I have read in a million places that it is normal, but I won't believe it is normal until she can say I am safely pregnant and things are progressing normally.  I am also VERY hopeful that I can get an anti-nausea prescription!  I start back at work tomorrow, and I really can't have any of this "bad day" nonsense.  I can't teach college composition classes from my couch.  I asked my dean, and he said no.  Booo.


So, more updates some time this week on how I manage to teach without puking or crying!  I am optimistic, but, you never know what the soybean has planned! 

Leaps and Bounds

Thanks to Arwen Mosher, I am no longer dying!  Let's give it up to her for telling me my blood sugar is likely all whack if I am eating things like saltines.  She suggested trying to get protein and fat into my mouth every time I eat.  She warned me it would sound terrible, but I trusted her and ate a nice fatty protein this morning and LIKE MAGIC the sea of sickness in my stomach calmed, and I probably could have eaten ANYTHING today.  I kept it up with a lot of small protein meals, and I am feeling like a rock star.


Her timing could not have been more perfect, because I had to head back to work today.  We had a 6-hour long meeting and I had been pretty worried that I would die 5 minutes into it and get fired.  But I survived!  And I even went GROCERY SHOPPING after the 40-minute drive and CAME HOME AND MADE CHILI!!!!  These things have not been happening lately because of all the death, but now it's like I'm a whole new lady.


The other great stride I made today is finally choosing a place to make an appointment for my first huge "intake" appointment.  I decided to try the Meridian's Women's Health Center on the advice of Miss Jess (you take a bow, too) and I liked the sound of the place.  I am even more excited that they have a certified midwife on staff, and I will be meeting her for my initial appointment.  The only problem is I still have to wait another two weeks to get in.  Grrr!  I am still having those terrible fears that I am not really pregnant, and I need some blood work or nice close up pictures of the baby (I kid) to provide me some evidence.  And I have lots of questions (surprise!).


In other news, this is what soybean looks like right about now:

Isn't she cute!?!?!  (Jeremy calls the baby "he" and I call the baby "she" -- just to be fair.)


The nose, mouth and ears are beginning to take shape, and the baby's heart is beating 100-160 times a minute.  Blood is beginning to course through his body, the intestines are developing, and the bud of tissue that will give rise to the lungs has appeared.  The pituitary gland is forming, as are the the rest of the brain, muscles, and bones.  The tongue and vocal cords are even beginning to form!


The baby is probably a quarter of an inch long and is about the size of a lentil bean.


I really wasn't prepared for how different it would be to read this information when it was MY BABY they were describing.  I cried when I read the 6-week physical changes descriptions to Jeremy from What to Expect When You're Expecting.  Well, no surprise there!


I continue to get GREAT ideas and advice and motivation.  Thanks to all of you, and keep it coming! 

The Crying Game

It seems cruel.  I mean, come on, body!!  I am emotional enough already!!  Why, oh why, did you feel the need to pump enough hormones through me to make me cry at the drop of a hat ... and sometimes be unable to stop.


When the ball dropped on New Year's Eve?  Oh, forget about it!  I had been crying for the entire 15 minute countdown in Times Square, but when the (fancy new Waterford) ball dropped, it was crazy, wracking sobs.  Poor Jeremy.  I bet that man thinks I am not pregnant and actually suffering from a nervous breakdown.  Or am possessed by the devil.


We watched The Village on New Year's Eve.  The Village -- an M. Night Shamalyn thriller, and I cried for about 25 minutes of the 90 minute film.


I was looking at stuff on-line and NURSING PADS made me cry!  Maybe it was the obvious reason (OH MY GOD, I AM THINKING ABOUT BREAST FEEDING WHICH WILL HURT LIKE CRAZY!!), or some convoluted emotional response that involved many different things that I had better not list here because I will start sobbing again.


Uh oh ... speak of the devil.  Gotta go get some Kleenex. 

A Little Uncertainty

While this whole whirlwind of telling everyone about the baby has been wonderful and memorable, it is scary too.  It might sound weird, but it's not like I felt all that pregnant right away.  I was queasy and exhausted, but it's not like I could feel the baby in there.  I was so scared that maybe this was a cruel joke, or a virus, or something crazy like that.  Then, of course, what if this was just a chemical pregnancy? What if the egg was fertilized but never implanted and in a few days I took a test again and it was negative??!?  

Okay, maybe I should have researched chemical pregnancies a little bit more before freaking out so much, but it was (and still is) scary.  

That feeling didn't go away, even after I got more pregnancy symptoms (read: horrible nausea, extreme fatigue, strange cravings, wild mood swings, and huge tender breasts).  I still think that this could all be psychological.  What if I just CONVINCED myself that I am pregnant, and my BRAIN (which has turned against me in the past, make no mistake about it) is making me have all these crazy symptoms.  It's not like I've never gone through a whole jar of dill pickles in one week before!

After wanting a baby for so many long years, after all the countless days when I broke down into tears because I was sure I would never get pregnant, this pregnancy thing is really hard to get used to.  It seems so tenuous.  At any moment, I feel like it could be snatched away from me -- not so fast, sweetheart.  No happiness for you!!

I wonder when it will feel ... okay.  Like it is for real and forever and our little soybean is here to stay.


For a little less serious version of how things have been going in these parts, just click here.

New Year's Pukey Eve/1st Pukey Wedding Anniversary

Well, tonight is New Year's Eve and our first wedding anniversary.  Sigh ... tre romantique!  


Except ... oh yeah, I am DYING.  The past couple of days have been a sick roller coaster of sickness, sobbing, and curling up in a ball on the couch.


My poor husband even made a delicious meal for our anniversary that I couldn't even stand to look at.  I had rice instead.


Then, of course was the cake.  Jeremy loved it.  I took a little bite and then asked Jeremy if I had to swallow it.  He told me I didn't have to, but I said I didn't want to risk a divorce.

Jeremy's mom had also gotten us a sweet bottle of champagne with a Happy Anniversary tag on it.  What a big night we have ahead of us!

Except, this was how I looked and felt the entire night ...

Those whole grain bagels are my new best friend.

Happy New Year's, everyone!!

Here Comes the Nausea!

I have been feeling okay these past few weeks.  Queasy and exhausted, but nothing I can't handle.  Until today.  Oh.  My.  Word.  At about 3 PM it hit me like a ton of bricks.  

I was sitting on the couch, minding my own business, when a wave of nausea like I have never experienced hit me.  I about fell over.  So I laid down, and I didn't get up until after Jeremy got home from work at 5.

I was laying on the couch, horrified and dying, when Jeremy walked in the door.  I asked him to come over to me and he didn't immediately -- he had the audacity to take off his shoes (slowly) -- so I started sobbing.  Jeremy asked me if he could bring me toast to make my stomach feel better, and I gagged so hard Jeremy took a few steps back!  I cried for a solid 20 minutes, telling him how horrible I felt, until he left (escaped) to walk the dog.  

I felt a little better after my cry, but when I stood up to go to the bathroom, I had to sit back down and stay down.  It wasn't until I finally thought of something to eat that wouldn't make me sick that I felt a little better.  But then I would feel better enough to get up and do something and I would over-do it and be back on the couch again.

I have been trying to eat little bits every hour, but it is hard to think of things that won't make me sick, and eating every hour is harder than I imagined!!  Once a few hours pass, I feel horrible again, and the thought of food is impossible.

I certainly hope this was a fluke or it will be over soon, because if this is what pregnancy is going to feel like ... well, this will be a LONG eight months!

December 23rd

December 23rd I woke up nice and early so I could make the 2-hour drive to the doctor's office to get and official thumbs up on being pregnant.  Yes, there are plenty of doctors in Lansing who could have told me the same thing, but I had an appointment scheduled for the beginning of January anyway, so I figured I could combine the two into one.


I got to Yale 20 minutes early and they called me back right away!  I was so excited, I was trembling.  Which was bad, because then the nurse told me it was time for the pregnancy test!!  I set the cup on the counter and stared at it a long time, willing myself to still be pregnant.  It was weird, because even though I had already gotten a positive test at home, I was terrified that it was gone and I wasn't pregnant anymore.


I sat and waited for the doctor, and even though it only took about three minutes, it felt like an hour.  My doctor walked in and said, "Well, Veronica, it looks like congratulations are in order!"   It took a minute to sink in.  I asked her, "So does that mean I am actually pregnant?  Like, for real?"  She laughed and told me I was.  I shrieked, and the doctor laughed.


From there, it was a whirlwind.  She kept asking me if I had any questions, but the big one I had was not a medical question at all.  The night before, Jeremy asked me if I thought we should tell everyone at Christmas or wait.  I was shocked, because he seemed REALLY excited to tell everyone, and usually I am the one who can't keep a secret!  He told me maybe we should ask the doctor if it was stupid to tell people this early, so I did.  She told me exactly what I had been thinking: the worst case scenario is we tell people and then lose the baby, but if we would want our friends and family to be support during that time in our lives, then why not tell them early?  It was like a weight was taken off my shoulders.


She listened to my breathing and felt my abdomen and all that, and then said she needed to order a test and to stay put.  I called Jeremy at work immediately to tell him that I wasn't imagining things and we were actually pregnant.  We were so excited!  The doctor came back in while I was still on the phone, and I immediately dropped it like I was a kid getting caught on her cell phone in class, but she just smiled and told me to stay on the phone and stepped back out.


I had a quick test run, all was well, then I got a prescription for prenatal vitamins, paid the bill and checked out.  I immediately called Jeremy again and we couldn't stop talking.  We decided we needed to come up with a fun way to tell everyone at Christmas, and I only had the rest of the day to accomplish it!  Then another call beeped in.  It was the doctor's office!  I freaked out and hung up on Jeremy.  They must be calling me to tell me there was an error.  There was another lady in there that day and SHE was the one who was pregnant, not me.  


It turns out I left my book in the exam room.  Oops.  When I walked back into the doctor's office, the elderly man who had been sitting next to me in the waiting room pointed at me, laughed, and said, "You forgot something!"  I laughed and got my book, and then he said, "It's okay.  We all do it!"


I had told my mom I would be in town briefly that morning, so I stopped over at the house.  I had no idea how I was going to keep my secret.  I felt like bursting!  When I got to the house, only my dad was there.  I was STARVING (come on, I'm growing a BABY!), but he wanted to sit and talk. Eventually, I stood up and physically dragged him out of his recliner, telling him we were going to get me a Greek Chicken Salad at the Yale Family Diner, pronto.


Later, my mom came home, and I still managed to keep my secret, but I skedaddled out of there as soon as possible so I could get my vitamins, plan the reveal, and keep my mouth shut!


Next up, I got to drive home to Lansing and go to Meijer to get some free prenatal vitamins and buy a fish oil supplement to get enough DHA for the baby.

I never thought I would be so excited to get a prescription!

After dropping off my prescription, I started wandering around the store, counting the seconds.  This was when the idea for the t-shirt hit me, and I ran around the store looking for fabric paints.  I circled those craft aisles for five minutes before I found them, and I was starting to panic!  After that, I had to find a plain white t-shirt that would be long enough for my freakishly long torso.  That was even more of a struggle, because the place was PACKED with people getting all their last minute presents.  

I finally found a shirt and went to get my prescription.  And they couldn't find it.  I started panicking again.  I felt like shouting, "I don't care whose name is on the outside, I need vitamins for my baby!!" but, thankfully I kept my cool and they found them after 5 minutes of rushing around.

THEN I had to go get in line to buy the shirt and paints.  Every single lane was open, and the shortest line was 20 people deep.  I really didn't think I was going to make it out of there alive!  Spoiler alert: I made it out alive, but I was a bit disgruntled.  

When I got back to the car, I immediately opened up all of my new pills to take a look.  The doctor had warned me that there were a variety of fish oils I could buy, and the only difference between the cheap and expensive was that the cheap ones tasted a little ... fishy.  I thought Jeremy would be proud of me if I could be stingy, so I got the best deal possible.  I grabbed my water bottle and downed the fish oil ... and learned that the doctor was SO RIGHT.

Very attractive.

After I got done tasting the fishiest fish oil on the planet, I had to head to the Meridian Mall to try to find the rest of the reveal: grandma and great-grandma frames.  

Like Meijer, the place was PACKED with people scrambling for last minute stuff.  Two hours later, I had FINALLY found everything I needed at Hallmark, and I walked up to the register like a zombie.  The nice lady rang me up, and I went to grab my wallet ... and realized it was on the front seat of my car and not in my purse.  And my car was parked approximately 2.8 miles away.  I apologized, dashed off, got it, dashed back, and ran into the store panting and disheveled.  It literally took me 15 minutes to complete this dash.  When I walked back into the store, a different employee (not the woman who originally rang me up) took one look at me and turned around to grab my stuff and continue ringing me up.  It must have been pretty obvious who I was!  I tried to imagine the lady: "If a disheveled woman comes running in, it is the lady who didn't bring her wallet with her to BUY things.  In a store."

I finally got out of the mall and drove home through the holiday traffic.  The 5 miles took 20 minutes.  I got home, walked the dog, and collapsed on the couch, which is where Jeremy found me when he got home from work 5 minutes later.

That night we got to have our own little special Christmas, but it was really weird (for me, anyway) to be opening presents that we had bought for each other before we knew we had a little one coming.  It seemed like a world ago that I bought Jeremy those presents.  And I felt a little guilty.  Jeremy shouldn't have bought me these presents!!  We should be spending money on practical things for the baby!!  All the same, the gift exchange was great, and then ...


I had shirts to paint ...

photo albums to wrap ...

and a frame to wrap.

Coming up next:  the big reveals!

December 22nd

December 22nd was the day I decided enough was enough and I should just go ahead and take a pregnancy test.  I had been having some symptoms for a few weeks, but since I had talked myself into thinking I was pregnant before, I wasn't getting my hopes up.  In fact, I took the test and, instead of hovering over it like I have in the past, I got in the shower.  When I got out, I told myself to not be upset when the test was negative like all the others.  That's when I saw this:

I cannot begin to describe how shocked I was.  My mouth dropped open and I started shaking.  But I was also scared and confused, because the line was so faint.  

I had always been under the impression that if there is any line at all, that is positive, since it is measuring the presence of hormones that you wouldn't have if you weren't pregnant.  However, I could not think in such a rational manner at that point!  

I stood in the bathroom for a long time, and then ran downstairs to take a picture of the test.  It took me 15 tries to get this picture!  I was so excited, I was shaking.

This was taking place at nine in the morning.  Jeremy was at work and our friend Jess was stopping by in a few hours to visit the museum (where Jeremy works and she used to work) and then finish up some last minute Christmas shopping with me.  But all I could think of was the possibility that we were having a BABY!!!

I immediately called my general practitioner back home in Yale (since I haven't bothered to get one here in Lansing) and set up an appointment to see her the next day.  I really needed some reassurance that I was really pregnant!

So, Jess arrived, and we went to the museum, visited for a while, and then went to lunch with Jeremy and Loel.  It was TORTURE having to spend all that time with him while keeping that huge secret.  I wanted to tell him right away, but I thought it would be much better if I could tell him in a more private and special way.  On top of that, I was feeling completely exhausted (as I had for the past few weeks) and a little queasy.  It was hard to pretend that everything was normal, and Jeremy even laughed at me when I asked I could stretch out on the benches at the museum for a little while.

When I went shopping with Jess, I felt like a total lame-o.  I was totally exhausted from all the excitement and activity (I read that just lying on the couch and making a baby is as exhausting as a normal person running a marathon -- this is EXACTLY how I felt!), and I just wanted it to be 5 o'clock so I could tell Jeremy.

When Jeremy got out of work, he called me and told me he needed to buy a few stocking stuffers for the pets and would be home in a while.  I insisted he come home immediately and go shopping later.  He was not excited about the prospect, but realized I was going to keep insisting until he gave in, so he came straight home.  When he came home, I handed him the computer and told him that I was started a new blog.  I wish I had a picture of the look he had on his face!!  He said, "You seriously made me come straight home to see a new blog??!?!" but then he looked at the screen and saw THIS blog:  The Life and Times of Baby Dimick.

Jeremy was shocked, excited, and overjoyed.  He grabbed me and held me, and then asked a million questions.  He asked for every detail, and it was the greatest moment.  I have had a lot of happy moments in my life, and my amazing wedding was less than a year ago, but nothing has compared to being able to tell Jeremy that we will soon be having a baby.

Stay tuned for details from December 23rd!